Being widowed in our African society.
Definition of a Widow: In accordance with the dictionary's explanation, a widow is a woman who has lost her husband and has not remarried. Widowhood refers to the state of being widowed. When an individual loses their spouse, they are often referred to as a widow or widower.
This narrative delves into the hardships faced by widows in Nigerian society, including trauma, discrimination, stigma, and financial struggles following the loss of their spouses.
Personal Experience as a Widow: Reflecting on my own journey as a widow, the initial encounter with discrimination occurred within the confines of the church. It was during the festive season of Christmas when the church arranged a couples' night event, with no provisions made for widows. Feeling excluded, I took the initiative to approach the senior pastor and requested the church to organize an outing for widows, as we didn't quite fit into the couples' category. To my surprise, he generously sponsored an outing for us. However, it saddened me that the widows who were members of the church were not considered in their plans.
Another form of discrimination I encountered was the unwritten rule that I should not be seen outside after 6 pm. This implied that regardless of where I went, I had to return home before the clock struck 6.
Additionally, the matter of dress code became a source of discomfort. While some might dismiss it as trivial, it held significant importance to me. At social gatherings, I was easily singled out as a widow due to my attire, making me vulnerable to various forms of unwanted attention.
In my view, these issues, though seemingly insignificant to some, hold profound significance in the lives of widows in our society. Our society and culture needs to change and evolve into one where a woman who has lost her husband doesn't feel like a cast out.
